After being sick for so long, I finally have a name for my illness: Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, otherwise known as P.O.T.S.

A cardiac condition that's stripped me of my health, weight (causing me to drop to anorexic weight), self confidence, friends, jobs and continuing my education.

My goals are simple: gain weight, be healthier, and get out more. Basically, get my life back!

I'm also hoping to spread some awareness on this little known condition, and to highlight the struggles of the underweight and people with "invisible illnesses."

Monday, April 25, 2011

(Almost) Excruciating Monday

Well, yesterday was a full day and today I'm definitely feeling it.
I'm so sore that I can barely move.
(case in point: it's 1pm and I still haven't been able to shower yet because the pain and exhaustion are so intense that I could just cry.)
**********
The intense depression is back. I'm starting to see a definitive link between crappy weather days and the days I feel the worst; physically, mentally and emotionally.
(Today we had a large pressure change and it's pouring; which will continue solidly through the next week...oh joy.)

I feel like the only thing I want to do is get into bed and stay there forever.

Amount of sleep: seven-ish hours. minimal rest though

Diet:
- Brunch: two servings hashbrown casserole, 4 slices super thin bacon, rice krispie treat,1 cup cranberry juice
- Dinner: fresh polish sausage, potatoes with cheese/butter/facon bits, 1.5 cups dr. pepper
- Snack 1: two snack-sized packets mini m&ms, 1 cup water
- Snack 2: nutella on bread, 2.5 cups water

Exercise/activities: none

P.O.T.S. symptoms experienced:
so far: pounding heart, arrhythmia, headache/migraine, extreme fatigue, body aches

Misc:

I found this saying, by chance, on a different website that I use:


"I am because we are."
- African aphorism

couldn't be more true right now.

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