After being sick for so long, I finally have a name for my illness: Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, otherwise known as P.O.T.S.

A cardiac condition that's stripped me of my health, weight (causing me to drop to anorexic weight), self confidence, friends, jobs and continuing my education.

My goals are simple: gain weight, be healthier, and get out more. Basically, get my life back!

I'm also hoping to spread some awareness on this little known condition, and to highlight the struggles of the underweight and people with "invisible illnesses."

Sunday, September 12, 2010

disappointed

*sigh* So, I found this really great dietitian who seemed like an awesome guy. He filled me with hope because he said he was going to contact other people who knew more about my condition as well as doing research on his own. I've tried to get a hold of him for a couple of weeks now...nothing.

His original suggestion was to graze...which is weird and I'm having a hard time doing it. But, even when I do manage to graze all day, I don't feel any better. It doesn't regulate my blood pressure any better, and I'm getting very depressed with it. Apparently no one wants to help me deal with this drug-free (although, I honestly am coming around to the fact that it truly can't be 100% drug free. Even when I consistently follow the diet I'm supposed to, it's still hard to get up without almost passing out. I have to take a break getting up stairs because my heart pounds- it's just...way too far passed that point.)

So, I just don't know.

At the moment, it's not all bad. Considering all of the stress I'm under I've still managed to gain 1lb. which isn't much, but normally I stop eating and lose weight. So, to gain is phenomenal. I'm up to 95lbs. Up 8lbs in a year. that's not bad