Being upset, naturally, I want to talk to somebody about it and it's times like these when it's glaringly obvious how much POTS has taken from me- in terms of relationships. I feel incredibly alone; very isolated. When I make a stray comment or something to my family, through facebook or whatever, they ignore it completely. As far as friends go? Forget it. Of course, I know people are busy and have lives, I don't expect anyone to be sitting around waiting for me, but when I'm reaching out in some form and receive no response, I'm definitely not going to approach someone and force the to talk about something they have no interest in. (I have a few really great online friends, but I'm talking people I know in 'real life'.)
I'm very lucky that my boyfriend is supportive. He's always willing to listen and be leaned on...but POTS is a huge imposition and has been for years. I feel guilty talking about it. I try my best not to complain but he knows when I'm not feeling well. (We've been together for years, he can just sense it at this point.)
I guess my only hope right at this point is to just keep pushing to get better, then be able to get out more. Until then, I'm on my own. I'll be talking to my specialist on Thursday to see what to try next.
No comments:
Post a Comment